Another angel gone up to Heaven

I write this now whilst the feeling is fresh...

a few moments ago I was told that my nan passed away, my father's mother. This came as an extreme shock to the system as despite her being a mature woman in her 80's, as a grandmother, the child in me expected her to live forever. The adult in me knew she wouldn't, but I had a belief she would be around for a little bit longer, and after that, a little while more.
My biggest regret with this is that we won't be able to attend the funeral. I don't feel like I've said a proper good bye to her, so I think I've now got to do that by mental prayer to the diety she prayed to (she was a very religious woman...which leads me to my next point).

Every time we spoke on the phone, she told me she was praying for me, wishing me the best in life and asking her deity that everything turn out well for me. Because of this, I felt she was always there, looking over my shoulder, helping me along the way, through the hard parts of my life. I've always felt that with both my grandmothers, the two grandparents I felt I knew the most. My mother's mother passed away some years ago when I was still a child and to this day, I think of her, even if it's just a passing thought.

I'm not a largely religious person myself. I don't believe in any fixed religion, but I believe there's a force out there, which watches over us and juggles the spirits around the world. However, with both my grandmother's gone, I now feel I've gained two people to watch over me and the rest of the family, in a way which is stronger than when they were alive.

My abuela was truly a wonderful person and I sincerely hope she's happy where she is now. She told us not to cry for her when she died, so I shall do my best not to. But her memory will live strong in me for time to come.

And if there's one thing I'll really miss about her is her telling me, every so often, to take a tray filled with bowls of food (olives, bread, little snacks here and there) and take my time eating it to stay strong and healthy.

Bless you Alejandrina.